Poster child

Will all arrogance I would like to declare that I am everything that this election is about. I am single,starting a business in a field I am well trained for and am very skilled at. With an inheritance I bought a nice apartment in a somewhat crappy part of town that will get to be fairly fancy in the next couple of years. I have no health insurance.

I am right smack in the middle. I don't earn enough for even the cheapest private plans. And I have to much to be deserving of Medicare. I even went up to the Medicare office this morning and was struck by how much the system is set on humiliating poor people asking for help.

It starts off by having to get there an hour before they even acknowledge your existence. You sit in the lobby of a fancy hospital in a clump, the people wanting free bee health insurance. The glances are killers. Doctors, patients, guys installing lights shoot this look to the masses thanking God that they are not so pathetic as to be sitting on the beggar bench. What also makes it worse almost everyone sitting with me just sat. No one reads,drinks coffee, gossips.They just sit as penance for being poor. I always carry a book with me everywhere I go. That way I could at least block off the condescending glances. Without that it would have too painful.

Then this guy hands out numbers on little pieces of well worn paper. They don't even make new numbers. Just rehash the cardboard day after day.Then they make you line up in a hall way,the way made us lineup after recess to come in side in an orderly fashion. I kept flashing on people I know in the medical profession who might see me there. Oh how I prayed that I would not be exposed.

When I finally got to the front of the line this nice woman asked how she could help me. Looked me up and down. Yes I am white,middle class, educated, Anglican speaking. I need help. Ends up with all the personal information I brought with me, I still didn't have enough. I would need to come back with bank statements and such.To prove I am broke and pathetic. When I got back home from the experience , it wasn't even 10 and I was totally drained .

Watching the news unfold today I suspect I am will much of the country. What will this mean? I read somewhere that they are estimating that 40,000 people will lose their jobs just in this state. My work website averages about 10 hits a day on line. The last 2 days it has dropped to 0. Personal self growth work gets real low on the list of necessity items. Damn my shoulders are tight.